Well, I got up at 4 this morning and I couldn't go back to sleep. I don't know why but I just couldn't go back to sleep. It is finally cold and I have all of my heaters on. My dogs are freezing their little fuzzy bunnies off too. I put their sweaters on and one of them is really pissed at me because he doesn't like wearing his sweater. Anyway, I heard from cowboy last night. He told me that he likes me. for some reason, that really meant a lot to me. I have been feeling like nobody likes me these days. I really, really want to be married but I am having a difficult time finding someone I like. I don't think cowboy is the guy for me. He doesn't have much going on and doesn't have any goals. He is content with where he is and he is working two jobs and struggling to pay his bills. He doesn't have time for me and no money to do things with. I don't have money either so it would be a good idea to be with someone in the same place as me or with more money right. I don't know but we don't have anything in common and he talks a lot. i think its because he is nervous but who knows.
I thought that i would meet someone online this year but that didn't happen. i met cowboy this year and dave last year and aaron the year before that. so far nothing is sticking just dating. now that zack is out of the picture i guess i should be able to focus better on finding someone else and not relying on him as a back up or to fullfill a need that i have from the opposite sex.
i am having a charlie brown marathon at home trying to get into the holiday spirit and it is working. i am very happy that we are not exchanging gifts this year one less thing to worry about. i dont like spending the money and doing all the shopping for other folks only for them to not liek the gift or to give me a gift that i dont like. i am so happy about that this year. i am going to be housesitting for my sister for a week. basically watching her dogs and keeping them company and staying at her unfriend house. i could be a nice house but it is cold and dark. i dont know why they just dont know how to create a home but they dont. their furniture sucks as well.
anyway, i have a schedule that i created for myself in order to continue being physically active during this time of year when i dont want to do anything and just stay at home on th ecouch wiht my dogs. i have mapped out a mile and a half walk and my challenge is to walk that at least once this break. i have also mapped out a few routes around my sisters place for me to do while i am on break. the only thing is that i heard it is supposed to rain so we will see if i am able to get out there.
lets start the new year off fresh. i am very excited about 2013. i feel like the baby is coming. i am very excited to meet someone and start a family
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